“You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back.” -Barbara De Angelis
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Don’t you think re-reading vows and being part of a raucous party makes sense. Proposing again? Better skip that part. Chances are, at least in my case, it wouldn’t go so well… or would it?
Always good to let someone know you love them and a trip away together, well, that sounded awfully good to me.
ROUND ONE, our original wedding, took place on the Iles of March in 2003. It was lovely and small, no family, just a few friends who happened to get our calls that morning.
We’d been engaged for six months and David was getting itchy to just do it. Jules and Sonya agreed to help me find a dress on Saturday morning so we set the ceremony for 1pm. It was goofy, profound, beautiful and tender but not at all what I imagined for us. I was happy that David liked it so much.
ROUND TWO marked the passing of eight years and the arrival of two of the most important things in my life, Simone and Naomi.
The RE-WED was hosted by Sarah & Richard Barton, Maryam Mohit & Erik Blachford, Janet & Lloyd Frink and Leslie & Nick Hanauer. They sent out mysterious invites with this link. I booked the flights and dug into the non-hermetically sealed kids costume chest to pull out my wedding gown. It was more than fine.
What a rush to put it on! Giddy. Even more heady was seeing the formal flocks en masse as us wives, gathered to ….tap the primitive archetype for another squeeze of juice. (Wordy but fun!)
Let the jollity begin!
The men assembled in their atrium cave and the women gathered above in a long velvety garret. We sorted and resorted till we became an organized female troupe standing by to sashay down the two tiers of stairs in our blinding finery. It was a show.
The minister proclaimed, “Life is to be measured not in breaths but in the moments that take our breath away.”
The ceremony was touching and playful and concluded with each couple reciting vows.
Yes, vows. I added a few lines to capture what our eight years had meant to me. David went white at the idea of reading his vows and shook his head that he hadn’t thought he would have to read those and he wasn’t prepared. The back side of my vows had his original text and I offered them to him. He was stricken but as the room started to become alive with words, he took the paper and lip synced while looking up at the ceiling. Inaudible but as I pealed my ears, in came the amorous words from all around me bouncing off the corners of the room. Then fireworks and smoke (for real) and we “re-wedded” couples cheered. Elvis look a-likes appeared by the dozens to wrap their arms around ours and lead us playfully toward the flashing bulbs of the patio reception. Onward!
Out in the bright sun, 70 suited pairs began receiving one another in a commingled reception. Soon an Elvis here or there appeared to ensure we had everything we needed and in a low pitch and stretched cadence, they came up to each of us and said, “Sorry to intervene, but …you know, it is time for your dinner seating.” We reentered the cave of a Kings feast and The Second Act began. Each table decorated with a equally amazing, though quite different, cake. I wandered among friends listening to freshly written love poems, songs, watching as goofy and sweet little mementos were being exchanged…and of course…tasting the cakes. There were arms draped around one another and sweet caresses between couples every where I went.
After dinner we migrated to the top of the world (a night club) with a grand balcony looking out over the neon of Las Vegas. The dancing was indoor and out and the great disco beat was easy to get lost in. David retired about then and the rest of us let the music take over.
The clan swayed together in big circles and then re-located to a swanky suite with plenty of provisions and a pool table. There the night rolled on with dancing on table tops, costume changes and the various silly antics we dream up to entertain one another and commemorate this adventure together.
The next day David and I went to see A Sense of Place, from Monet to Hockney at the Bellagio museum (Therrien, Mangold, Cristo, Boudin, Lichtenstein, Giehier, Millet, Rauschenberg, Muniz, Chagall and others) and then followed a treasure hunt through the Skyscraper hotels of Las Vegas to discover a vast modern art collection sited across the city. When we re-joined the tribe, it was time for dinner at Jaleo, a Vegas version of Andre’s DC classic. (Have you ever had liquid olives melt on your tongue or pomme frite served in a sneaker?)
To top-off our weekend of debauchery and revelry, we snuck into a fever pitch disco and grooved in a pit of colliding bodies and then recovered in the breezy pool or on the two person patio swing…. til morning was sighted at the edge of the dry earth. A wedding indeed.
How many times have you been married…. to the same person?
